I feel really loved. Honestly who needs guys when u have such awesome friends. HUR hur hur. That laughter reminds me of Sam. okay anyway, just to update my really great friends who gave me their 2 cents worth and also all u other kaypohs who are just hoping for a really exciting storyline (i dont blame u guys), here the (second part of the) story goes.
so early sunday morning, i was lying in bed in aruna's house with my beautiful red phone whose battery was DEAD (explains why i could not reply to smses! sorry guys!i wasnt wallowing in regret) beside me. i woke up to try switch on my phone and it did switch on for approximately 1 minute which allowed me to receive 2 msgs; the first was an unknown 0411..... number and the second one was Rit. =)
and as u probably already guessed, the unknown number belonged to B. i didnt and couldnt do anything bout that msg he sent me so i decided till i reached back to my hostel and heard more 2 cents worth before doing anything. after much contemplation and listenin to Rit n Sam, i called him in the evening and we talked. for some funny reason, it donned on me while i was waiting for him to answer the phone, that there was no way that i wanted to go through with this. Don't ask why. it was a short, sweet conversation which basically ended with "i enjoyed every moment we were out together" and "i will miss u."and of course like a true lady (hur hur hur) i replied "i will miss you too" and i swear, i really meant it from the bottom of my heart.
as much as i made the decision to not go through with this, i couldnt help but feel tht little bit of emptiness in me the entire day today, that B's not here in adelaide anymore. its a decision i made and its a decision i will not regret. yes im gonna feel empty for the next couple of days but honestly, pick up the damn pieces and get on with life man, after all it was MY decision. (sorry i gotta keep reminding myself that).
Thank u Rit, Sam, Skinny, Pri, Fa, Niran, my cousin Anita, Doo & May. you guys are just absolutely awesome ppl. if anyone tried to take u away frm me i will skin them alive.
People, this is what i say tonight.
Messed up,
After that i'm much too bright.
Monday, June 30, 2008
Saturday, June 28, 2008
i dunno why im gonna do this post, 'cos honestly i havent been 100% open with the way i feel bout things (i.e. relationships with men) on this blog. BUT i havent been back home (hostel) for more than an hour in the past 3 days, only to take a shower n run out again to go meet people, and i think wanting to stayover at aruna's place for the weekend is more than just wanting to spend more time with her n aunty. im missing sth, real bad and i cant put my finger on why i AM. i mean, i noe who and what im missing but i dunno why.
so here the story goes. i'm sitting here alone in aruna's room, with a glass of wine and i'm just gonna lay it out there for everyone: rev-haters, rev-lovers, rev's awesome friends and family.
i met this guy, through a friend. he's my friend's housemate and i've known him for approximately 2 months now. ok to make things easier lets just name my friend A and his housemate B (funny thing is, their names really do start with A and B). So we've been out a couple of times, with of course A around. The funny thing is i rmb meeting B for the first time and nt having much of an impression of him ('cos i smsed rit to say "nth great"). but for some reason, each and everytime ive met him thereafter, he's always left me feeling very, very..different.i mean, he leaves me giggly, he reads my thoughts, he whispers to ask if im ok when ive been quiet all evening (and its prob 'cos im wondering why this guy is soo different), he taught me hw to eat peking duck- he sounds like someone else i spoke bout last december on this blog. but this guy i...dunno.
here's the thing, he's left for sydney, for good, this morning and is prob halfway through his 18hrs drive and ive not stopped thinking bout him. i stayed over at their place on thurs/fri 'cos we were hving sort of a 'farewell' for him. and on thurs night, while B & i were sitting alone on the couch, with A not ard, for once 'cos he had to go get some stuff, B said,
B: so um.. do u think we should get together?
me: WHAT?
B: do u think WE should get together?
me: HUH?
B: 'cos i think we have something going on between us here.
me: ummm..
B: we have some sort of connection, i noe that
me: connection..rightttt.
B: yes we do
me: yeh..... sure..heh! (which came out really more sarcasticallly then i intended it to)
and A appeared. so both B n i stopped talkin bout it.
and i was shocked at how i responded to him. i mean i didnt hv a single drop of alcohol in me, not one trickle. i didnt say "but you're leaving adelaide...for good" or i didnt say "why are u asking this NOW? when you're leaving?"
i don't get it, i just don't get it.
friday morning he left for his last day of school really early in the morning, while i was still asleep, but he did wake me up to say gdbye n all i said was "have a nice day," even though i knew that i probably wouldnt be seeing him for...the rest of my life?
to make things stupid-er, we didnt exchnge contacts. i mean, he did suggest it but we were walking and i was freezing so i found it extremely inconvenient to get my hands and my hp out of my pocket, so i said "sure later" but of course my later never came.
i noe A is always there for me to get B's contact number but... im wondering, should i?
pri, haowie, xx, niran, please dont think any differently of me cos u guys really noe wht situation im in.
i guess ppl leave for a reason? i guess i hv too much pride for a reason? and i guess my brain doesnt function when it shld, for a reason?
as stupid as it is, im wondering if he's thinking bout me as he's doing his 18 hr drive and i keep telling myself NO he isnt, just to make myself feel better.
i shld just let the weekend pass and i should go bout my normal life and seriously, whtever im feeling right now wld not be there a week from now.
or would it? =(
I am holding myself back frm whipping tht hp out and asking A for B's number. holding myself back sooo bad.
guys: rit, sam, pri, doo, niran, xx, sha, whoever else who reads my blog and knows how to contact me, do me a favour, sms me, email me, give me ur two cents worth. SOON.
so here the story goes. i'm sitting here alone in aruna's room, with a glass of wine and i'm just gonna lay it out there for everyone: rev-haters, rev-lovers, rev's awesome friends and family.
i met this guy, through a friend. he's my friend's housemate and i've known him for approximately 2 months now. ok to make things easier lets just name my friend A and his housemate B (funny thing is, their names really do start with A and B). So we've been out a couple of times, with of course A around. The funny thing is i rmb meeting B for the first time and nt having much of an impression of him ('cos i smsed rit to say "nth great"). but for some reason, each and everytime ive met him thereafter, he's always left me feeling very, very..different.i mean, he leaves me giggly, he reads my thoughts, he whispers to ask if im ok when ive been quiet all evening (and its prob 'cos im wondering why this guy is soo different), he taught me hw to eat peking duck- he sounds like someone else i spoke bout last december on this blog. but this guy i...dunno.
here's the thing, he's left for sydney, for good, this morning and is prob halfway through his 18hrs drive and ive not stopped thinking bout him. i stayed over at their place on thurs/fri 'cos we were hving sort of a 'farewell' for him. and on thurs night, while B & i were sitting alone on the couch, with A not ard, for once 'cos he had to go get some stuff, B said,
B: so um.. do u think we should get together?
me: WHAT?
B: do u think WE should get together?
me: HUH?
B: 'cos i think we have something going on between us here.
me: ummm..
B: we have some sort of connection, i noe that
me: connection..rightttt.
B: yes we do
me: yeh..... sure..heh! (which came out really more sarcasticallly then i intended it to)
and A appeared. so both B n i stopped talkin bout it.
and i was shocked at how i responded to him. i mean i didnt hv a single drop of alcohol in me, not one trickle. i didnt say "but you're leaving adelaide...for good" or i didnt say "why are u asking this NOW? when you're leaving?"
i don't get it, i just don't get it.
friday morning he left for his last day of school really early in the morning, while i was still asleep, but he did wake me up to say gdbye n all i said was "have a nice day," even though i knew that i probably wouldnt be seeing him for...the rest of my life?
to make things stupid-er, we didnt exchnge contacts. i mean, he did suggest it but we were walking and i was freezing so i found it extremely inconvenient to get my hands and my hp out of my pocket, so i said "sure later" but of course my later never came.
i noe A is always there for me to get B's contact number but... im wondering, should i?
pri, haowie, xx, niran, please dont think any differently of me cos u guys really noe wht situation im in.
i guess ppl leave for a reason? i guess i hv too much pride for a reason? and i guess my brain doesnt function when it shld, for a reason?
as stupid as it is, im wondering if he's thinking bout me as he's doing his 18 hr drive and i keep telling myself NO he isnt, just to make myself feel better.
i shld just let the weekend pass and i should go bout my normal life and seriously, whtever im feeling right now wld not be there a week from now.
or would it? =(
I am holding myself back frm whipping tht hp out and asking A for B's number. holding myself back sooo bad.
guys: rit, sam, pri, doo, niran, xx, sha, whoever else who reads my blog and knows how to contact me, do me a favour, sms me, email me, give me ur two cents worth. SOON.
Thursday, June 19, 2008
unfort, no exciting photos or vids to post for the past weekend.
Soo, soo many ppl's b'days this month.
started off with :
8th june- Haowie doo! who got drunk on one shot of vodka. Hahahaha!
10th june- my 2 little twin cousins who really arent little anymore, i think they're 11 this year.
15th june- Fariz the Monkey who made pri n me stay up for hours over the phone,
17th june- my aunt (mom's youngest and only sister) whom i love soo dearly
19th june- Basitd who's claimed he's ballooned...in size,
21st june- Roselyna who apparently has too many b'day presents (already?? her b'day's on the 21st)
23rd june- my DARLING jon jonsson
on a different note,
2 months and still loving every moment of it.
I said i'll love you like the stars above, i'll love you till I die
Soo, soo many ppl's b'days this month.
started off with :
8th june- Haowie doo! who got drunk on one shot of vodka. Hahahaha!
10th june- my 2 little twin cousins who really arent little anymore, i think they're 11 this year.
15th june- Fariz the Monkey who made pri n me stay up for hours over the phone,
17th june- my aunt (mom's youngest and only sister) whom i love soo dearly
19th june- Basitd who's claimed he's ballooned...in size,
21st june- Roselyna who apparently has too many b'day presents (already?? her b'day's on the 21st)
23rd june- my DARLING jon jonsson
on a different note,
2 months and still loving every moment of it.
I said i'll love you like the stars above, i'll love you till I die
Friday, June 13, 2008
I absolutely can't let this day/date go by without blogging.
On the topic of relationships ('cos they're showing Bridget Jones' Diary and the name Bridget...Ugh), i was talkin to a 'special' friend (as how aunty jayanthi, aruna's mom would put it) and ALSO thinking bout the random sms Sam sent on tuesday to a couple of us, asking for permission to do our wedding planning, if any, n realised that the future looks pretty bleak.
Marriage has never been on my cards for way too many reasons. The most obvious one being unable to find THE one. but u noe, a change of attitude, change of environment, change of perception, makes u reconsider ur option/s.
for starters, finding a partner starts with a #$&* care attitude of what others are going to think of him, or rather, you being with him. i've realised that ive been soo caught up worrying about whether i would look good with him or him or him or what people would think bout him, him or him, that ive let men slip thru my fingers, just...like...that. i gotta admit that this definitely has been sth tht's stopped me from letting my heart go.
i feel tht relationships should not stop you from being the independent person tht you've always been. there simply is no reason to why u cant have ur breathing space when you are in a relationship. it's about accommodating, knowing when to bug off, knowing when to let go, knowing when to Love. relationships aren't and shouldnt be restricting.
so you know, marriage should be likewise. of course that and a million vows and 2 mature minds.
marriage, ONLY marriage, NOT kids. unfort, the change of environment has not chnged my perception of having kids. yuck.
and when i say the future looks bleak, i mean its gonna be difficult finding the appropriate age to get married. after much thought i realised that the earliest i wld prob be able to get married is 28-29, considering i do my masters a year after finishing my bachelors, which is quite unlikely 'cos i need to earn enough to pay for my masters. n then i gotta spend the next couple of years actually saving up for the marriage. and if the biological clock in me decides to even start working, woah...at wat age do the kids come in man? like never? (NOT that im complaining)
so i guess marriage is ok, but the kids? they still remain as this huge, foggy doubt in my mind. SIGH.
On the topic of relationships ('cos they're showing Bridget Jones' Diary and the name Bridget...Ugh), i was talkin to a 'special' friend (as how aunty jayanthi, aruna's mom would put it) and ALSO thinking bout the random sms Sam sent on tuesday to a couple of us, asking for permission to do our wedding planning, if any, n realised that the future looks pretty bleak.
Marriage has never been on my cards for way too many reasons. The most obvious one being unable to find THE one. but u noe, a change of attitude, change of environment, change of perception, makes u reconsider ur option/s.
for starters, finding a partner starts with a #$&* care attitude of what others are going to think of him, or rather, you being with him. i've realised that ive been soo caught up worrying about whether i would look good with him or him or him or what people would think bout him, him or him, that ive let men slip thru my fingers, just...like...that. i gotta admit that this definitely has been sth tht's stopped me from letting my heart go.
i feel tht relationships should not stop you from being the independent person tht you've always been. there simply is no reason to why u cant have ur breathing space when you are in a relationship. it's about accommodating, knowing when to bug off, knowing when to let go, knowing when to Love. relationships aren't and shouldnt be restricting.
so you know, marriage should be likewise. of course that and a million vows and 2 mature minds.
marriage, ONLY marriage, NOT kids. unfort, the change of environment has not chnged my perception of having kids. yuck.
and when i say the future looks bleak, i mean its gonna be difficult finding the appropriate age to get married. after much thought i realised that the earliest i wld prob be able to get married is 28-29, considering i do my masters a year after finishing my bachelors, which is quite unlikely 'cos i need to earn enough to pay for my masters. n then i gotta spend the next couple of years actually saving up for the marriage. and if the biological clock in me decides to even start working, woah...at wat age do the kids come in man? like never? (NOT that im complaining)
so i guess marriage is ok, but the kids? they still remain as this huge, foggy doubt in my mind. SIGH.
And as promised, the video of my fren's singing.
ok guys, happpy friday the 13th.
Monday, June 09, 2008
like every long weekend, this one went by in a *SNAP*. it was the queen's birthday today. God save the queen.
the weekend went a little haywire 'cos of my sleep schedule. Dad, mom, sorry. i didnt really do much studying.
Steph's Party was awesome, she was soo touched she was reduced to tears. We had Chicken Curry (not my idea, but it sure helped ease one of the many cravings) cooked by my fellow singaporean, Alan(hyper guy in striped shirt in the video and prob my closest buddy in aust). Soo proud of him. It was really yummy.
GGrrr, blogger is not allowing me to post pics.
Anyway, my mom's on Facebook. I find that extremely adorable. She ringed me up on sunday morning, when i had just gotten back and half dead on the bed, to say,
Mom: oh Revathi, i am on book face
Me: book face? (i knew she meant facebook, but u noe..)
Mom: the one you and your brothers are on
Me: OOooh. Facebook Ma, facebook.
cute, very cute.
next entry, i will post a vid on my fren's awesome singing.
the weekend went a little haywire 'cos of my sleep schedule. Dad, mom, sorry. i didnt really do much studying.
Steph's Party was awesome, she was soo touched she was reduced to tears. We had Chicken Curry (not my idea, but it sure helped ease one of the many cravings) cooked by my fellow singaporean, Alan(hyper guy in striped shirt in the video and prob my closest buddy in aust). Soo proud of him. It was really yummy.
GGrrr, blogger is not allowing me to post pics.
Anyway, my mom's on Facebook. I find that extremely adorable. She ringed me up on sunday morning, when i had just gotten back and half dead on the bed, to say,
Mom: oh Revathi, i am on book face
Me: book face? (i knew she meant facebook, but u noe..)
Mom: the one you and your brothers are on
Me: OOooh. Facebook Ma, facebook.
cute, very cute.
next entry, i will post a vid on my fren's awesome singing.
Saturday, June 07, 2008
its been quite a while hasn't it. i didnt even talk bout my grocery shopping the past weekend, gasp!
so sam's back from france n she's going berserk. she didn't get me a frenchman, i suppose, but that's OKAY. i will stay true to Vz Boy. Post pics sam.
the more u say u hate sth, the more u will realise how much u love it. for e.g. im gettin addicted to big brother. its soo hilarious PLUS there's been a new addition to the house, a puppy named ollie! he reminds me soo much of baby coby when he first entered our house. soooo ^%$#ing adorable i tell u.
my parents hv been the most updated people when it comes to movies. when they first went to watch indiana jones, i thought they were just bored but recently when they went to watch narnia; prince caspian (or whtever the title is) i noe they're just showing off. They sure know how to live it up when the kids are not around.
Speaking of which, i've been wondering if my parents are undergoing/facing empty-nest syndrome. i'd think after having a house thts been filled with quite a lot of life, with constant noise, with a constant flow of kid's friends going in n out of the house, constant sound of the playstation, guys yelling at the playstation/tv screen, the stupid exchange of remarks, me singing in the shower, honestly, who wouldnt notice the pin-drop silence whenever u return home from a day's work. but then again, when i think/hear the amount of fussing they do over Coby, i don't think they really have the time to face sth like that. cooobbbyyyyyy. he's really, the most spoilt pet i know.
just the other day i was baby talking (i shld stop doing that n treat him like an adult) to coby over the phone (while mom held the phone to his ear) and immediately, his ears pricked n he ran to my room door. HOW smart is my dog?!
so kids, if ur plannin on leaving home, get ur parents a pet.
we're planning a party tomorrow, i mean later today, for my fren's bday. i hope things turn out fine. we spent like approx 2 hrs at another fren's place preparing stuff, tasting different concoctions of alc punches, seriously im gonna get soo soo sick of alcohol. then i got soo tired i plopped myself infront of the tv to watch "about a boy" n i didnt feel like movin till 11 plus. n i seriously wanted to get home by midnight. thnkfully i didnt miss the last bus before the "after midnight" bus services. "after midnight" buses r torturous. i have to alight at the interchange n walk thru the dodgy underpass n by the dark alley until i reach the hostel. n i always hv a fear tht whenever a car passes me, some guy will roll down his window, take out a gun n start shooting. watchin too much news.but there has been a surge in shooting cases over here.psychos.
Cristiano is leaving ManU for real madrid. wht the...
he's still blooody hot. bloody. bloody hot.
i think i shld get some sleep. i have a looooong day ahead of me.
so sam's back from france n she's going berserk. she didn't get me a frenchman, i suppose, but that's OKAY. i will stay true to Vz Boy. Post pics sam.
the more u say u hate sth, the more u will realise how much u love it. for e.g. im gettin addicted to big brother. its soo hilarious PLUS there's been a new addition to the house, a puppy named ollie! he reminds me soo much of baby coby when he first entered our house. soooo ^%$#ing adorable i tell u.
my parents hv been the most updated people when it comes to movies. when they first went to watch indiana jones, i thought they were just bored but recently when they went to watch narnia; prince caspian (or whtever the title is) i noe they're just showing off. They sure know how to live it up when the kids are not around.
Speaking of which, i've been wondering if my parents are undergoing/facing empty-nest syndrome. i'd think after having a house thts been filled with quite a lot of life, with constant noise, with a constant flow of kid's friends going in n out of the house, constant sound of the playstation, guys yelling at the playstation/tv screen, the stupid exchange of remarks, me singing in the shower, honestly, who wouldnt notice the pin-drop silence whenever u return home from a day's work. but then again, when i think/hear the amount of fussing they do over Coby, i don't think they really have the time to face sth like that. cooobbbyyyyyy. he's really, the most spoilt pet i know.
just the other day i was baby talking (i shld stop doing that n treat him like an adult) to coby over the phone (while mom held the phone to his ear) and immediately, his ears pricked n he ran to my room door. HOW smart is my dog?!
so kids, if ur plannin on leaving home, get ur parents a pet.
we're planning a party tomorrow, i mean later today, for my fren's bday. i hope things turn out fine. we spent like approx 2 hrs at another fren's place preparing stuff, tasting different concoctions of alc punches, seriously im gonna get soo soo sick of alcohol. then i got soo tired i plopped myself infront of the tv to watch "about a boy" n i didnt feel like movin till 11 plus. n i seriously wanted to get home by midnight. thnkfully i didnt miss the last bus before the "after midnight" bus services. "after midnight" buses r torturous. i have to alight at the interchange n walk thru the dodgy underpass n by the dark alley until i reach the hostel. n i always hv a fear tht whenever a car passes me, some guy will roll down his window, take out a gun n start shooting. watchin too much news.but there has been a surge in shooting cases over here.psychos.
Cristiano is leaving ManU for real madrid. wht the...
he's still blooody hot. bloody. bloody hot.
i think i shld get some sleep. i have a looooong day ahead of me.
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